Under the Watsons' Porch

1. Bored to Death Today, Saturday, June 6, is my birthday and I'm twelve although I tell people who don't otherwise know me that I'm thirteen, and they believe me. I'm an excellent liar. It's noon and I'm sitting on our front porch in an Adirondack chair drinking pale lemonade, which looks like white wine, from a long-stemmed wineglass, which I took from the cabinet where my mother keeps her best glasses. My parents are out with my brother, Milo, probably buying me some more birthday presents because they feel terrible. At least my parents do. I had to cancel my birthday party, which was going to be today, because Rosie O'Leary was having hers and her invitations got sent out before mine did and I didn't get one from her. So my friends are at Rosie's party and I'm here. "Maybe the invitation Rosie sent to you was lost in the mail, Ellie," my mother said, trying, as she always does, to be optimistic. "Rosie didn't send me an invitation, Mom," I said. "Oh dear," my mother said in that way she has of speaking when she doesn't know what else to say. "Never mind," I said. "I don't like Rosie and I'd be bored to death at her stupid birthday party." My mother agreed especially about Rosie, but later I heard my father say he never did like Mr. O'Leary and my mother replied that all of the O'Learys, including the grandmother, were "predatory," her favorite word this year, so I put a pillow over my ears and pretended to be asleep. "I hope you'll be okay," my mother said just a little while ago as she left the house with Milo and my father for the shops of Toledo. I waved goodbye and said I was fine, and glad not to have a birthday party of my own and especially not to be at Rosie's. It's exhausting to be the child of parents who worry as much about your happiness as mine do. From the bathroom window, I had watched them drive away, then took a shower and put on powder blue shorts and an oversized white tee so the hard sticky-out plums on their way to becoming breasts don't show through the shirt. I put my wet hair in a high ponytail, took the fancy wineglass, and that's how I happen to be on the front porch making a list of my special enemies at Duncan Middle School when Tommy Bowers walks out of the yellow house next door. I catch sight of him trotting down the steps out of the corner of my eye, his hands in the pockets of his trousers, wearing a starchy white shirt with the sleeves rolled up and his long black hair floppy across his forehead. I'm thinking he'll stop, look in my direction, and call out to me. "What are you doing?" I'm hoping he will ask. "Just drinking white wine and writing a poem to my boyfriend in South Africa," I'll say, asking him to come up on the front porch and join me. But he's on his way up the street and I don't think I caught his attention, so there's no chance of talking now. I don't know Tommy Bowers. This is the first time I've even seen him, but I've heard all about him. All I really know is that the day before yesterday he moved into the yellow house next door with Mr. and Mrs. Bowers--her name is Clarissa--and their old calico cat, Bounce, who is missing an ear. We live in a gossipy neighborhood and people have been talking about the Bowerses ever since they bought the yellow house. Especially they've been talking about Tommy. "The Bowerses are older parents," my mother confides in me as if she's already become friends with them even though they've never met. "And I understand Tommy's a handful." "Handful" is my grandmother's word and she usually uses it about me. As if I could fit in anyone's hand, especially my tiny grandmother's. I lean against the porch railing watching Tommy Bowers walk up the street full of confidence, a little swing to his walShreve, Susan Richards is the author of 'Under the Watsons' Porch ', published 2006 under ISBN 9780440419693 and ISBN 0440419697.